Just One of Those Days #1

I titled it #1 because I feel as if this won't be the last, even though I wish it was.

It's just one of those days today. I feel real sucky and down, and I really don't even know the reasons why. I have a this feeling inside, its like I have a hole in my chest, and I have no clue where it came from. It hurts, and I have no real way of knowing how to patch it up. All I can really do, is just sulk, especially because I feel like I have no one to really talk to. Whether because I feel like no one cares, or I just feel real embarrassed to show this weak side of me. It makes me feel even worse because I feel like I am such a loser for even feeling this way. As I sit here and contemplate on this feeling, I realize that its more like a blackhole, as if its sucking me inside of it with its hard gravitational force. Somethings wrong and I can't pinpoint it...FUDGE! I am though really turned of by some situations with certain people in my life. I feel like because of thier immaturity (and yes they are adult older then men, so immaturity shouldn't even be the issue with them) and their mouths, all I want to do is really pull myself away from them, anywhere they are, and anything I have to share with them. In reality, I really wish I could just move out to a whole new and different place, and just be a whole new me. Just do everything and anything I want to do, and not worry about what people think, because since I won't really know any of these people, I wont care about their feelings and thoughts. Alaska sounds real good after all.....take me with you.

I Cry
Sometimes when I'm alone
I Cry,
Cause I am on my own.
The tears I cry are bitter and warm.
They flow with life but take no form
I Cry because my heart is torn.
I find it difficult to carry on.

If I had an ear to confiding,
I would cry among my treasured friend,
but who do you know that stops that long,
to help another carry on.

The world moves fast and it would rather pass by.
Then to stop and see what makes one cry,
so painful and sad.
And sometimes...
I Cry
and no one cares about why.

By Tupac Shakur

Elders: kids in an old body

Today is a Jewish holiday, Rosh Hashana. In the building that i work at, its predominately Jewish. Therefore, there were alot of ppl coming by to have dinner, and alot of families getting together. But the most that i noticed was the elders. There were alot of older ppl coming to see thier children and grandchildren to share this holiday. One thing tho that really caught my eye was how these children, treated thier elders, their grandparents. They had to speak to them as if they were children again. An older man, who I'm sure is a grandfather, spoke to his mother, as if she was the child. He would say: "This way mother..." "Yes, into the elevator now" "Be careful, hold my hand" It was almost like taking care of a child. And the elder will walk real slow with her walker, just like a baby when its learning its first steps. My mom once told me, we come into this world as a child, and we leave as a child. We grow the tallest we can, and as the year take toll we start to shrink again. Whats the most interesting is, i bet all these elders now a days had such a nice life. I'm sure they can look back into their younger years and be proud. Feel proud of the accomplishments that they have. Sometimes we tke our grandparents, and great grandparents, if we have them, for granted. But if us Generation Y(1977-1997) and Generation Z (1997- to now) if we sat down with our elders and asked about thier youth, im sure they have a lifetime worth of stories, that wont sound old school and boring, but somewhat similars to ours. Just that they were able to enjoy it better, they took life at a slow pace(partly beacuse they had to), we want everything now, at the instant(partly becuase we are use to it). Money is always an issue, but i bet they did not fret about having the latest video game, or latest jordans. They didnt have so many extra things to waste thier money on. They enjoyed nature, they enjoyed lakes, and beaches. Our Generation doesnt know how to enjoy the outdoors. Everthing we do needs energy. To all the elders out there, i admire and envy your age. I wish i could go back to your days, and just have some plain ol good clean fun.